If someone wanted to answer this week’s Em & Lo Wise Guy’s column question (“If a guy’s in a booty call relationship with a woman, is there a chance he’d ever want to actually date her, could it ever blossom into something more?”) they could do a lot worse than read cartoonist Scott Adams of Dilbert.com Blog this morning. It’s about the relationship between curiosity and attraction in general terms, but it opens with a highly-relevant bang.
Curiosity is one of the most underrated phenomena in the world. It’s ironic that people aren’t more curious about curiosity. It’s a powerful thing.
For example, if you ever wondered if someone is attracted to you, the answer lies in curiosity. If someone asks personal questions about your past, your plans, your likes and dislikes, that is an unambiguous sign of attraction. If someone tries to steer you into the bedroom without some conspicuous data gathering, that is a sign of simple horniness.
That sounds about right though doesn’t it? Adams goes on to connect the same principle to friendship, job interviews, sales calls, and product idea. It’s definitely worth a read.
Here’s my own take on the Wise Guy question (full disclosure – I’m in Em & Lo’s wise-guy rotation but not this week.) A genuinely curiosity-free booty-call relationship might never “blossom” into long-term romance. But before you consider that a problem consider also that most genuine friendships never evolve into romance either.
But here’s a tip: booty-call relationships can can blossom into lifelong friendships. If you allow yourselves to get to actually know each other. Even decades later I’m still very good friends with quite a few of my old flings, flames, and one-night-stands.
