I’m in this week’s Wise Guys feature at Em & Lo says
“Is the FFM threeway really the holy grail for straight guys? If so, why? And if it’s not, why do so many people assume it is?”
And here’s how I answered:
I think it just ties a lot of stereotypical male fantasies together: voyeurism, variety, the possibly mistaken impression that women just automatically know better how to give each other orgasms (which guys generally really want but aren’t always sure how to give). There are also the fantasies of polygamy, of enabling promiscuity (a girlfriend might not mind you sleeping around if she’s right there with you doing it). And there’s also the not-quite-laughable fantasy that the average man can satisfy two (or more) women, at the same time, all by himself.
In my only real, all-the-way threeway I joined a woman I had a desperate crush on and together we gave her partner an extremely good time. But after that we fulfilled my favorite holy grail: one-on-one sex ’til dawn with an experienced, very enthusiastic partner that I really, really like. Based on that experience, I think threeways are perfectly lovely. But they’re more of an “everyone should visit Paris” sort of milestone than a holy grail. Put it this way: I don’t think as many people lose as much sleep wishing they could have a second threeway as they do wishing they could have their first.
