Coke Talk seriously nails a problem with men’s reaction to “date rape” that’s less well understood but real and highly gender-bound.

Your boyfriend is using denial as a coping mechanism. It’s easier for him to insultingly believe that it never happened than it is for him to process the truth emotionally.

Call your boyfriend out on his denial, and tell him how insulting it is for him not to believe you. Let him know that the truth does not obligate him to act on your behalf. In other words, you’re not asking him to go confront the rapist or defend your honor. All you’re asking for is understanding and respect.

She said it here.

Yup. The social construction of masculinity makes it paradoxically very difficult to do anything but a) go off on a manly rampage or b) go into complete denial. And part of that denial often includes what? Did you say blaming the victim? Right in one!

Clue #2: Contrary to both tradition and English Common Law, when it comes to the male partners of rape victims his honor has nothing to do with it.