Introduction: For a number of years I participated in the Half-Nekked Thursday self-photography meme. About a year or so ago I began winding down and I can't even remember the last time I participated. Maybe because it's finally spring here (even if an unusually cold and wet one even for the Pacific Northwest) or maybe it's because I've really started perking up since beginning a course of Welbutrin about a month ago, or maybe it's because I don't think I'll ever shake the "NSFW" designation for my poor politics and sociology of sex, gender, and relationships, or maybe it's just for the heck of it. But I was thinking about it the other day took a few experimental over-the-shoulder photos. And made a surprise discovery about my physical apperance that I thought was worth bringing up.
So we're all aware that there's, um, controversy about whether or not people in general, and women in particular, should remove their pubic hair. All fine and fair enough -- there's considerable differences of opinion, much involving appearance-related pressure, others involving "pre-pubescence," others involving other esthetics such as sensation, texture, conformity, and even cleanliness.
So! Not much agreement there.
There's another, stealthier area where agreement about body-hair removal appears to be much closer to universal. It's in an unusual place. And it appears almost exclusively on only one biological sex.
Check out the following keyword searches (from Google, May 11, 2011.)
Image captured by Figleaf (hey that's me) Posted under a Creative Commons license.
Wild, huh? Considering the controversy it's not surprising that there would be more than million hits on the key phrase "hair removal pubic." One million hits!
Wilder, and perhaps weirder, there are seventeen million hits on the key phrase "hair removal back."
You can mix and match key phrases, adding for instance waxing, shaving, laser, and other removal-related terms to the base terms "pubic" and "back" and get fairly consistent results. Back hair -- typically an age-related development that tends to signal middle age in men (along with ear and nose hair) has very, very few advocates, adherents, or aficionados.
Sigh. Which means it's very likely that instead of spending time contemplating my cute but manly butt in the photo below (c'mon, it looks cute!) your attention may instead be drawn in more of a shoulder-ly direction. And if it does your attention may further be drawn to a not-quite-lush but growing dusting of back and shoulder hair.
Based on Google's results I'm guessing odds are about 17 to 1 that if you do notice the back hair you won't find it very appealing. But I'd be delighted to be proven wrong.
"Image captured by Figleaf (hey that's me) Posted under a Creative Commons license.
Happy HNT (or Half-nekkid Thursday!)
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I think the only downside to
Submitted by Adela (not verified) on Wed, 2011-05-11 23:23.I think the only downside to back hair is for the man himself as mine is always complaining about itchy ingrown hairs; it doesn't bother me asthetics wise. A cheeky thought towards a certain psuedo science is that this, like the silverback gorilla it is a sign of sexual maturity and social dominace.
Hereby affirming my
Submitted by Ranai (not verified) on Thu, 2011-05-12 01:40.Hereby affirming my attraction to hair. Including hair on a man’s back.
Seeing your lovely photo immediately makes me want to touch.
Thank you for the eye candy!
The only hair that gets removed in this household is my partner’s beard which he shaves, as we both like his face without a beard.
Wheras I loooove beards and
Submitted by Plymouth (not verified) on Sat, 2011-05-14 23:15.Wheras I loooove beards and long lush head-hair but prefer my boys to be hairless pretty much everywhere else :) (pubic hair is nice trimmed, I don't require full-on shaved).
P.S. Somewhat related to the
Submitted by Ranai (not verified) on Thu, 2011-05-12 02:40.P.S. Somewhat related to the topic, check out this gem and its comments. Not a cute butt & back hair in this pic, but a <a href="http://www.erosblog.com/2009/08/12/hairy-man-ass/" target="_blank">man’s cute butt with hair</a>.
Sorry about the botched link,
Submitted by Ranai (not verified) on Thu, 2011-05-12 11:51.Sorry about the botched link, maybe you can fix it.
Wait -- there's back hair in
Submitted by Argyle (not verified) on Thu, 2011-05-12 10:57.Wait -- there's back hair in that pic? ;)
Seriously, that's not the first thing -- or even the fifth thing -- I would have noticed without the lead-in you gave it. And if/when I did, it would be taken as just a normal feature of the male body. (Actually, don't take this the wrong way, but the first thing I noticed was the artistic and inventive angle/composition: Nifty! Well-done.)
FWIW, I have no aversion whatsoever to male back hair. In its own way, it's rather sexy because it's a very masculine trait. However, lack of back hair (or any other hair) in a man, whether naturally or via shaving/waxing isn't a dealbreaker, either. For me, whatever the body's owner prefers is fine and good.
Also near-universally
Submitted by Alia (not verified) on Thu, 2011-05-12 12:23.Also near-universally unacceptable in women: armpit hair. I haven't shaved mine in several months, but it's been an effort of will to get over feeling like I should feel bad about it.
And that's a lovely photo, figleaf :) Seconding the composition compliments. And yes, your butt does look cute.
It took me a couple of years,
Submitted by Plymouth (not verified) on Sat, 2011-05-14 23:18.It took me a couple of years, back in high school, to get over my self-consciousness about having armpit hair. But the few times I tried to shave it I got a nasty rash and couldn't wear deodorant for about a week. I think most people would prefer me hairy to stinky :) Especially since most of the time I wear things with sleeves and they can't see it anyway!
The guy I'm currently hooking
Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on Thu, 2011-05-12 13:57.The guy I'm currently hooking up with has copious amounts of hair, including shoulder/back hair. I was slightly taken aback at first, just because I wasn't used to it, but I actually really enjoy it. I feel like there's more tactile sensations when a guy is hairy. Besides, a little back hair never hurt nobody.
Also, nice butt. Cute but manly.
I think the Google search may
Submitted by Daphne B. (not verified) on Thu, 2011-05-12 16:41.I think the Google search may have been a little flawed. "Back" in the sense of "it was out of style, now it's back in!" could be contaminating.
"pubic hair" in quotes +
Submitted by Daphne B. (not verified) on Thu, 2011-05-12 16:44."pubic hair" in quotes + removal = 3,510,000 results
"back hair" in quotes + removal = 314,000 results
Just FYI.
This makes more sense. Back
Submitted by chingona on Thu, 2011-05-12 23:01.This makes more sense. Back hair doesn't have a lot of adherents, but in my experience, men are a lot more likely to just tolerate the things about their bodies that they don't like.
Cute butt. Nice shot. I don't
Submitted by chingona on Thu, 2011-05-12 23:12.Cute butt. Nice shot. I don't see anything unpleasing in the photo.
I don't know that I would have noticed the back hair without the intro, but I also understand why it might seem like a deal to you. My stretchmarks felt disfiguring when I first noticed them. But like those stretchmarks, I don't think that back hair is the deal to others that you might worry it is.
That's not at all what I
Submitted by tlt (not verified) on Thu, 2011-05-12 23:21.That's not at all what I envision when I hear or read the phrase "back hair." I think of someone like this guy I was in college marching band with who looked like he was running around in a mink stole when he took his shirt off.
But he DID take his shirt off. It was during band camp, in the South, in August. Paleness, pudgy-ness and hairy-ness were distant concerns in comparison to anything that would allow more air to get to your skin. And everyone saw his hairy back and lived to tell about it. I don't remember every hearing any "Ew"-type comments from any women. It was only other guys who would sort of mildly tease him about it for a few minutes.
Mind you, he was a young, tall, thin, good-looking guy with a head of thick, gorgeous dark hair. Someone less conventionally attractive might not have gotten a pass.
If you hadn't mentioned it, I probably would have sort of seen the hair in your photo without seeing it.
I am amazed at this silliness
Submitted by Candice (not verified) on Fri, 2011-05-13 05:37.I am amazed at this silliness over hair on men. I think body hair on men is manly and very attractive - also nice to touch! One of the many great things about mature men ...
My body hair in general (but
Submitted by SnowdropExplodes (not verified) on Fri, 2011-05-13 06:44.My body hair in general (but back hair especially) bothers me, it's one of the two things about my body that, if I could find a permanent and side-effect free way of changing it, I would. (If I had the spare cash, I suppose I might submit to waxing, but not certain about that!)
But when I've been with someone, and I tell her about this, I always get told the opposite, that it's really attractive (like many of the commenters here are saying about back hair).
Snowdrop Explodes - I've
Submitted by Candice (not verified) on Fri, 2011-05-13 17:25.Snowdrop Explodes - I've learnt that men see my body differently than I see it, so I accept their perspective. I suggest you also try to do this - afterall, its win-win! You feel better about yourself and the ladies get to run their fingers through all that glorious hair. As my darling has grown older, he has actually grown body hair and I love it. I'd not go for a permanent solution as that would deprive a future partner of the option of enjoying your body hair! :-)
Thanks for your perspective,
Submitted by SnowdropExplodes (not verified) on Fri, 2011-05-13 18:26.Thanks for your perspective, Candice - it's not entirely win-win, though: making my sense of okayness with my body dependent on others' approval seems like too big of a sacrifice to me. I accept that some women may find my body hair attractive, and when they do I welcome their approval. However, there have been times when it has been problematic because of what it symbolises to someone, and just felt like asking me to be someone I'm not (for example, if someone likes it because they like it as a symbol of my masculinity, will they then reject me for having an equally strong feminine side? That has actually happened to me before). But if someone finds the look or feel pleasant in itself, that's okay.
I'm okay with my body not being my ideal.
I'm okay with people liking the things about my body that I dislike.
I'm even okay, if I'm in a committed relationship with someone, with deferring to their preferences in some things if they particularly like something about my body and would be sad if I changed it.
However, I'm not okay with liking my body just because others like it. I needed that at one stage, to be able to get to liking anything about my body, but I also needed to move on from there and claim liking it for myself and in terms of what I like.
Just a quick thank you to
Submitted by figleaf on Fri, 2011-05-13 17:36.Just a quick thank you to everyone who's commented. And an extra thank you to Candice for reminding me that in matters of our personal appearance we *think* we should have final say but really we only have one vote in the matter, and if we're talking about "perception of my body" if we don't like something about ourselves but everyone else either likes it or never notices it at all then we should "lose" gracefully. And *gratefully!* :-)
figleaf
mmm Snowdrop...I probably
Submitted by Candice (not verified) on Sat, 2011-05-14 03:29.mmm Snowdrop...I probably could have expressed myself better. I agree that you should not depend on others for your opinion of your body and what you like. Everyone is free to think as they will and its healthy to have an internal locus of control. If faced by unrealistic benchmarks set in the media or perhaps an overcritical partner; it's healthy to think independently and maintain a positive self image. However, I think many of us are too hard on ourselves and this leads to unhappiness and dysfunctional behaviour. Sincere compliments therefore help to recalibrate one's self image. It looks like you have moved past where I am in a positiive way.