Photo by Flickr user Photography_Gal. Used under a Creative Commons license.

Don't ask me why I would know such a thing but sex on a trampoline isn't as much fun as it sounds.

Actually that's not quite true. It's lovely to be outdoors, if you get a thrill out of the possibility of being seen or perhaps caught it can be fun, and hey, it's a nice relatively flat surface. And since trampolines are a great form of exercise and sex after mild physical exertion can be pretty great because of the increased circulation, oxygenation, muscle activation, and body warmth.

So let me rephrase my original sentence: "don't ask me why I would know such a thing but vigorous woman- or man-on-top PIV intercourse on a trampoline isn't as much fun as it sounds.

Yes, of the 100,000 or so trampoline-related emergency room visits sprained penises, bruised hips and pubic bones, and other pelvis-related injuries rank pretty low. But...

Oh wait, I said don't ask why I would know such a thing... :-)

I'll just say that it was years ago.

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Incidentally, at least according to Google, while Rule #34 ("if you can imagine it there's porn of it") appears to be conserved thanks to a few relatively random uploads to sites like YouPorn, there do not appear to be any dedicated trampoline porn sites.

This, incidentally, could be more significant than some people might think. A few years ago I predicted that the flood of amateur photography made possible by stigma relaxation plus affordable home recording equipment plus ordinary network effects would have strong negative consequences in the market for paid porn. After all, 5 megapixel cameras on dumb cellphones are now par for the course so if even one tenth of one percent of the billion or so people with digital capability choose to upload images they've taken for their own enjoyment that's 100,000 new actors and models competing with paid performers and producers.

I'm confident there will always be specialty sites, particularly for the kinds of things far more people want to consume than are willing to produce for their own recreation (cough kink.com) but to invert William Gibson's famous quip, the future may not yet be evenly distributed but it's here.

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Note: I don't object to commercial porn in principle, and the total market for professionals will never be completely replaced any more than affordable home equipment has replaced ordinary professional photographers. But the influx of volunteers both in front of and behind cameras has reduced the previously high opportunities for arbitraging the ability to make money by depicting fairly ordinary people engaging in what at the end of the day are fairly ordinary sexual activities.