You Know About Labiaplasty, Right? Ever Wonder Why You've Never Heard of "Peno-plasty?"

Posted by figleaf on Thu, 2012-07-05 23:39

So here's a little gap missing from the narrative of men who'd "stick it in anything that moves."

You know how there's all this anxiety out there about "ugly" vulvas? I mean, of course you do! Look at all the articles about labioplasty! Look at all the very-real anxious questions sent to sex-advice columnists. And... and...

Why is there no comparable frenzy trying to help men "cure" their "ugly" penises? I mean, yeah, men get anxious about penis size, but even though there's at least as much variation in penis appearance as there is in vulva and labia appearance you just don't see guys worrying that, say, a large glans or a loose foreskin or the other veins are so "abnormal" their partners won't want to... well... be partners with them.

Which is funny because, again, there's the common narrative that women are so picky about their male partners they'll fall over themselves looking for excuses to say no, while men on the other hand are supposed to be so desperate for any kind of partner at all that we'll have sex with sheep!

And yet.

Who exactly is it worrying about turning their partners off with the sheer lippiness of their "forbidden treasures?"

This is so not an indictment of women's alleged vanity. Or men's alleged callousness. Or allegations about women's indifference or men's squeamishness. Or anything having to do with any single individual's decisions with their actual individual partners. Instead it's a question about the difference between the stories we tell each other about what men and women care about, and what men and women actually care about.

View the discussion thread.

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"Phalloplasty" does exist,

Submitted by Irene (not verified) on Fri, 2012-07-06 13:46.

"Phalloplasty" does exist, but it's basically enlargement. (Apparently ten times as commonly resorted to in Greece as anywhere else. Who knew? Also, it's your fault I have to scrub my browser now.) The ads for that swamp any other kind of plastic surgery for gentlemen's bits that might be out there, apart from circumcision, of course.

It's like anything else, I suppose -- the market goes where culturally it's easiest to find the money, which is not necessarily where it's easiest to find the shame. In a culture where women have more plastic surgery than men already (again, apart from circumcision, which most men who've had it don't remember), it's easier to sell women than men on a new procedure. But I do think it's probably easier for men to get worried about what their penises look like because they're relatively public. The number of vulvas I've seen that weren't either my own or being exhibited due to a diaper change is very, very small, and a lot of women never look at their own from what I hear. So I suspect a much smaller fraction of women think plastic surgery on their bits would do any good, but of those a much higher fraction are willing to put money into it.

Actually, now that I think about it, I suspect there are a lot of women who think vulvas, full stop, are icky and gross (and how sad that is), but many fewer who think that that's in any way fixable by surgery. But I think it's also easier for women than men to just not think about the appearance of their genitals at all.

Well said! I am always seeing

Submitted by Candice (not verified) on Sun, 2012-07-08 05:09.

Well said! I am always seeing differences between what we say exists and what actually exists, and then the false narative changes reality in its own image.

Vulvas are what they are - like most things, carry on with confidence and everyone will follow along and be happy! ::-) C

Thanks for dropping by,

Submitted by figleaf on Mon, 2012-07-09 12:58.

Thanks for dropping by, Candice! By the way, I thought you were already in my blogroll. I've just fixed that. Your blog will start showing up there whenever my server caches decide to refresh themselves. --fl