double standards

Acknowledgement for Mary Matalan's Point About Gay Marriage Success and Straight Marriage Failures

Should we congratulate conservatives when they correctly say the obvious? I'd say yes. Case in point: Mary Matalin says, correctly, that failed heterosexual marriages are a far greater threat to the institution of marriage than successful gay ones. David Edwards has the scoop:

Republican strategist Mary Matalin, who has previously said that marriage equality is not a civil right, asserted that polls now show Americans support same sex marriage because they know it’s not a “threat to the civil order.”

“Well, because Americans have common sense,” she explained. “There are important constitutional, biological, theological, ontological questions relative to homosexual marriage. People who live in the real world say, the greater threat to the civil order are the heterosexuals who don’t get married and are making babies. That’s an epidemic in crisis proportions. That is irrefutably more problematic for our culture than homosexuals getting married.”

Source: Raw Story

Good for Matalan!

Now one could argue, as I often do, that the tradition of marriage has some violent and alienating elements that make even successful marriage problematic (i.e. Which Husband Would You Stone For Adultery?) And one could argue, as I've also done in the past but Kevin Drum and others have done more recently, that single-parent families aren't as problematic for society as Matalan suggests. And one could argue, as numerous others have argued, that rather than celebrate secular recognition of gay marriage we should stop secularly recognizing marriage at all. But! If you're going to stand up for the institution, as Matalan and others gay and straight choose to, then there's exactly zero question that Newt Gingrich, Ronald Reagan, or Britney Spears' hetero marriages undermine the institution far, far, far more than the gay and lesbian couples who began getting married here in Washington State at 12:01 AM this morning. The heterosexual shotgun marriages of children in Nebraska and elsewhere undermine it far more than the same-sex marriages that will soon take place in Maine. The shaky, fragile, and outright false heterosexual marriages of David Vitters, Elliot Spitzer, Ted Haggard, or Phyllis Gates can't make less of a mockery of the institution any gay marriages that's likely take place in California, Minnesota, Hawaii, Massachusetts and on and on around the country.

Note: this doesn't mean some percentage of same-sex couples won't eventually turn out to have marriages every bit as bogus as current hetero ones can get. In fact, since gay people are exactly like straight people that's both a) inevitable but also b) the whole point! We're not enabling gay marriage because gay people are more noble nor because straight people are more depraved -- we're doing it because if any couple should be able to do it then every should be!

So yeah. Even though it's obvious, good for Matalan!


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What Keeps Getting Missed When Activists Try to Distinguish Sex Trafficking From All the Rest of Human Trafficking?

Laura Clawson says

A Human Rights Watch report based on interviews with dozens of farmworkers as well as many attorneys, service providers, law enforcement officials and others involved in the agriculture industry details the problems these women face. The problem is widespread:

A 2010 survey of 150 farmworker women in California’s Central Valley found that 80 percent had experienced some form of sexual harassment, while a report by the Southern Poverty Law Center found that a majority of their 150 interviewees had also experienced sexual harassment.

Because assailants are often supervisors, women who resist sexual harassment or assault are often fired in retaliation, sometimes along with their entire families or with coworkers who try to stand up for them

Source: Daily Kos

It's just so... conceited to claim that people trafficking into commercial sex is the only conceivable thing we should be worrying our pretty little heads about. My only quibble would be that the report makes it sound as though only women in precarious, smuggled, or trafficked agricultural work are subject to sexual harassment and sexual coercion, but that's just a quibble: it matters more that anyone at all is acknowledging that "non-sex" smuggled, trafficked, and otherwise poorly-documented workers are at risk. Especially since credible reports suggest that they (along with trafficked manufacturing, domestic, and hospitality workers) make up close to 90% of humans trafficked worldwide.


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Curious Gender Imbalance in the Curiosity of (Mostly-Male) Sex Researchers

Photo by Flickr user marsmet462. Cached as a bandwidth-conserving courtesy
Photo by Flickr user marsmet462. Used under a Creative Commons license.

Sweet mother of pearl is there ever a mind-bending difference in the number of research papers on "female arousal" compared to similar studies of men.

This despite the fact that it sure looks like sex researchers (particularly principle investigators) are overwhelmingly male. And would have plenty of research material at... er... hand.

You'd think, especially for no-brainer (heh) PET-scan research like this one, called High-intensity Erotic Visual Stimuli De-activate the Primary Visual Cortex in Women, someone would bother to try the same experiment on men to see whether there were differences or similarities.

Or, if they did do use such experimental "controls" you'd think they'd mention it in the abstract. Not least because you'd think someone would be interested in one of two obvious outcomes

  • Research showed that women's brains categorically process "high-intensity erotic visual stimuli" differently than do men's, or
  • Research showed that women's and men's brains process such stimuli similarly.

Either way you'd think news about the latter two would be more interesting. But... probably because it would involve learning something about male sexuality... either nobody bothered mentioning it or, more likely, nobody's even bothered to try.

It's not that nobody's interested.  But most of the time it's not very integrated -- people generally seem to study a) female arousal, b) female arousal, c) female arousal, d) male arousal, e) female arousal, f) gay male arousal, g) female arousal, etc.  But you only occasionally see the same experiements conducted on both men and women. 

I still think the problem is that since everybody already "knows" everything you could possibly know about male sexuality (e.g. 90% of men masturbate and the other 10% are liars) there's no real reason to look... to see what if any of what we "know" is true.


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Yikes! Using Pope John Paul II's Reasoning, If Women Shouldn't Be Priests He Still Probably Shouldn't Have Been One Either!

Speaking of that article about of male Catholic clergy (literally!) Lording it over their female counterparts, I still really balk at the Church's fundamental justification for a) objecting to the positions (some) nuns are taking and b) for allowing only male clergy to "rewriting the group's statutes, reviewing all its plans and programs — including approving speakers — and ensuring the organization properly follows Catholic prayer and ritual."  From the same Seattle Times article...

"Some commentaries on 'patriarchy' distort the way in which Jesus has structured sacramental life in the church," the authors of the report wrote.

This almost certainly refers to Pope John Paul II's 1994 invocation of "infallability" that since Jesus selected only male apostles he must have explicitly intended that only men could be priests.  This has never particularly held water for me.  For instance, the later ministry of Paul to the Gentiles notwithstanding, while Jesus had many admirers from all over, not only did he select only men as apostles, he also selected only practicing Jews as apostles.  And while Jesus had many admirers he selected only Jewish men from the vicinity of Galilee.  (Ok, except for Judas, who was from Kerioth of Judah in Hebron, but how did he work out!?!?!)

And yet John Paul never balked at the ordination of non-Jewish priests or of priests who had never even seen the Sea of Gallilee, let alone grown up around it.

This is not, incidentally, a minor issue.  Because while at several points in the Gospels Jesus expresses toleration for gentiles he couldn't be more clear about the intensity or the scope of his focus on the Jews of Israel.

Thus while there really isn't any reason to belief that Jesus was disinterested in the salvation of gentiles his express selection of only Israeli Jewish apostles is at least as unambiguous as his selection of only male apostles.

Jesus certainly never appointed a Polish gentile any more than he appointed an Israelite Jewish woman, yet John Paul II never questioned his own claim to the priesthood, let alone the infallibility of his pronunciation against women.

Despite having carefully read the Church's arguments I happen to believe John Paul II was entirely suitable to have been ordained as a priest, same as all other non-Jewish, non-Gallilee-native priests.  However, having read the same arguments I believe the only reasons women of faith continue to be excluded from the priesthood are based not on Jesus's choices but instead on hubris, over-reliance on tradition, and a peculiar argument against the possibility that Jesus could accidentally have made a mistake that has perpetuated for 60 generations... and a giant, walloping dose of self-serving, pulling-up-the-ladder patriarchal distortion.


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Common Feminist Critique of the New TV Show "Girls" Is Itself Steeped in Essential, Patriarchal Stereotypes of Women

Image from dontknowreally.tumblr.com. Cached as a bandwidth-conserving courtesy
Image from dontknowreally.tumblr.com.

In her review of the new show Girls Amanda Marcotte totally gets how some feminists still fall for the patriarchal-pedestal stereotype that women are naturally wise, serious, moral, hard working, chaste, and otherwise sugar, spice, and everything nice.  And that if they're not then they're broken, wrong, and someone to be both ashamed of and ashamed for.   (Emphasis mine.)

I lament how much ink is being spilled about how it's scary and upsetting to see women performing the same kind of comic tropes that men have done for roughly forever. Now, most critics don't see it that way. They didn't stop for a second to wonder if they'd issue the same criticisms if it was a male-centric show. For instance, I highly doubt Madeline Davis of Jezebel would write a piece where she lambasted a sitcom about a man because the comic main character made a bunch of stupid choices she feels are irresponsible and she hopes that young [men?] out there don't make. Like I said in my Prospect piece, the double standard is staggering. Men in comedy get to be stupid, get to make mistakes, get to make bad decisions and have comically exagerrated bad sex, and we all laugh because we know it's a comedy, not a symposium on How To Act Right. That so many feminist-minded women don't notice what they're doing here is distressing to me.

Source: Pandagon

Overall point being that relentless "positive" stereotypes are still stereotypes.  And even when feminists find them flattering old sexist stereotypes are still sexist. There's nothing wrong or shocking about half the population being below average. Nor, for better or worse, is there much stigma overall that much comedy depends on depictions of below-average people. And, duh, women being people it's ok for half of them to be below average losers too.*

Quick tip: Does anyone old enough to remember the comedy show Friends think any young men consciously or unconsciously emulated the amoral wastrel character Joey?  The dim and mopey Ross? The Maxwell Smart character's brutality or promiscuity in the 1960?  The Maynard G. Krebb's character's pre-doper conformity aversion in the 1950s?  No?

Think any 40-year-old men emulate the Louie character contemporary show of the same name that Amanda mentions in another (excellent) post along the same lines? No? Then either a) ask yourself why the double standard when the characters are women as in Girls or else b) chill.

* It would be one thing if the characters are all depicted as cliché TV bimbos instead of normal sitcom losers. But that's evidently not a problem in Girls.


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Threatening Slut Shaming While Seeking Redress for Being Slut-Shamed is the Wrong Strategy for Amy Koch's Alleged Male Victim

David Taintor reports that

The saga continues over former Minnesota Senate Majority Leader Amy Koch’s (R) “inappropriate relationship” with a subordinate staffer. Michael Brodkorb, who served as Koch’s executive assistant and communications director, claims that he was fired after the relationship was discovered because of his gender. He also says he has proof that other female staffers who had relationships with legislators were allowed to keep their jobs.

Source: TPM News

On the one hand, good for Brodkorb! The only men who come close to full-fledged "slut shaming" are men in (or presumed to be in) relationships with women in recognizable positions of power. And by all the evidence available publicly before trial the treatment he's received from supervisory staff who ultimately report to Majority Leader Koch does smell like classic fall-out and cover-up behavior tarnishing. And yeah, whatever one might think of canoodling with one's boss, or with marital infidelity, or even Republican double-standards when it comes pre-marital sex, extra marital sex or (lately) any sex at all, it's still the case that one shouldn't suffer employment discrimination based on either your sex or the sex of your higher-up paramour. Or at least you shouldn't suffer more than comparable members of other sexes. So again, yeah, good for Brodkorb for dragging this out into the open.

That said...

This part from the story isn't so great: Brodkorb appears to be upping the pressure for a settlement by threatening to depose other women who have had affairs with male legislators but were merely transferred rather than fired.  He also plans to depose those male legislators as well.

While generally strategically offering to embarrass 3rd parties in order to pressure a settlement is probably standard courtroom maneuvering and not even hardball tactics, in this particular case -- subjecting subordinate women potential humiliation by forcing them to disclose (under threat of either contempt or perjury no less) their current or erstwhile relationships with powerful men I think the strategy is pretty rotten.


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The Missing Vasectomy Mandate Kerfuffle: Is It Because It Would Never Occur to Them to Call Men "Sluts?"

Kind of funny how those Affordable Care Act rules mandate coverage for vasectomies as well as birth control pills. But all the 'wingers want to talk about is blocking contraception for women.

 


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Weird Gender Imbalances, Contraception Edition

Does anyone think there'd be nearly the same kerfuffle about insurance-provided birth control pills and other contraception if it was for men instead of women?

Does anyone seriously think Republicans like Senator Blount, political party enforcers like Rush Limbaugh, or Presidential candidates like Rick Santorum would be so recklessly intent on driving their party over a cliff if the issue was male contraception?

To be fair, I think the Catholic Bishops are consistent enough that they'd be trying to stir up a fuss about it.  But what are the chances that 'winger conservatives would be any less disrespectful of Catholic opposition to male birth control than they are about, say, Catholic opposition to capital punishment or Catholic support for the poor and the sick?

Would 'wingers go running around the countryside with poorly-spelled handmade signs on posterboard trying to stop men from getting a "The Pill?"

I mean, yeah, sure, Patriarchy, misogyny, slut-shaming, "sanctity of 'life,'" yada, yada, yada.  All that.

But...

It's like... even after the Utah State Legislature gets through with "sex education" people are still going to understand that it's... pretty irrelevant who's using the contraception.  They're going to realize that women can be just as "promiscuous" if men are using contraception as when women do.  They're going to realize that if the whole point of keeping contraception out of the hands of women is really to raise the consequences of sex such that women are unwilling to have it or else be so wracked by anxiety that they can't enjoy it then all that would still go out the window when men bring the contraception instead.

So on paper you'd think they'd be as liable to throw temper tantrums about male contraception as about female contraception.

But...

But...

I'll ask again, does anyone think there'd be nearly the same kerfuffle about insurance-provided birth control pills and other contraception if it was for men instead of women?

I just don't think so.

That's just so weird to me.

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For the record, repeated market studies show that if or when a contraceptive "pill" for men became available roughly as many men say they're willing to use it as women say they're willing to use The Pill.  Not all men, no, but then not all women do either -- it's about the same either way.  But, as with The Pill for women, you don't need 100% adoption for it to be pretty darn successful product.


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Republicans Don't Get the Joke, Rebuff Virginia Democrat's Attempt to Highlight Punitive Government Intrusion in Private Lives

Jill Filopovic on the way one Virginia State senator is tackling 'wingers tendencies to use even healthcare to encourage men's sexuality and discourage women's.

To protest a bill that would require women to undergo an ultrasound before having an abortion, Virginia State Sen. Janet Howell (D-Fairfax) on Monday attached an amendment that would require men to have a rectal exam and a cardiac stress test before obtaining a prescription for erectile dysfunction medication.

“We need some gender equity here,” she told HuffPost. “The Virginia senate is about to pass a bill that will require a woman to have totally unnecessary medical procedure at their cost and inconvenience. If we’re going to do that to women, why not do that to men?”

Her amendment didn’t pass, but good on her.

Now don’t get me wrong: I don’t think that men should have to undergo rectal exams and cardiac stress tests before getting Viagra. I think that’s silly and wasteful and unnecessary and invasive. But I also think that women’s health is so routinely politicized, and is so widely accepted as something that it’s ok to politicize, that turning the tables might make men think a little bit harder about these issues. Right-wing politicians have positioned reproductive rights as about abortion and babies, not as what they really are: Fundamentally tied to the body. Laws like this force that conversation; they force politicians to explain why a procedure tied to female reproduction should included legally-mandated penetration and shame, while male reproduction gets a smile and a prescription.

Source: Feministe

And of course both Jill and Sen. Howell have been clear that they don't think either men or women should have burdensome, intrusive, and unnecessary procedures imposed on them when all they really need is routine medical care. They were joking -- the seem to believe that both men and women are entitled to ordinary sexual health and healthcare. The 'wingers, unfortunately, are dead serious about increasing the imbalance between what men and women receive.


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Red Herring Alert: Covering Viagra Didn't Inspire Church-Employee Orgies So Neither Will Contraception Coverage

Image by Flickr user Mark Klotz. Cached as a bandwidth-conserving courtesy
Image by Flickr user Mark Klotz. Used under a Creative Commons license.

In a review of historic opposition to contraception in the face of President Obama's directive that (virtually) all employee healthcare plans fund contraception for women the way they fund Viagra and Cialis for men E.J. Graff first reviews the biggest standard, historic objection to contraception

Late-19th- and early-20th-century pundits said that the nation would become a bordello if anyone could have sex without consequences and warned of the death of the American family.

Source: TAPPED

And finds it wanting (emphasis mine)

In other words, women can work for Catholic hospitals, colleges, social-services groups, and so on—and still have the same rights to sexual health coverage as men, under the same plans. All that Viagra needn't lead to either 19 children and counting; to abortions; or to impoverished women.

Ouch!

The Viagra-but-no-pill argument actually cuts two ways with hidebound institutions such as the Catholic and many Protestant churches. Their argument against contraception is that it interferes with women's "natural and normal" functioning, and thus constitutes an unnatural intervention in human reproduction.

The problem, of course, is that even if one were to argue (as the Catholic hierarchy in fact still does) that "virtuous" men could use Viagra "only" for reproduction there's the issue of the Church's ban on other forms of "unnatural intervention" like in-vitro and artificial insemnation. Sort of by-definition if a guy can't get a woodie without medication then "nature" has decreed he should do without.

And yet to the very best of my knowledge there is no Church doctrine forbidding its employee insurance plans from covering, or indeed its healthcare facilities from dispensing, Viagra or Cialis.

But I digress...

At the end of the day, neither Viagra or Cialis have created catastrophic baby booms, orgy outbreaks, upticks in divorce, or any of the other bugaboos projected by opponents of contraception. Certainly not among the kind of people willing to become employees of the Church.

Therefore prior evidence suggests that contraception availability will also not produce similar licentiousness.  Nor, as we have seen, above, is contraception any more of an "unnatural intervention" in fertility than is Viagra or Cialis.  Both claims, therefore, are red herrings.  There may be <em>some</em> legitimate reason that conservatives object to giving women control over their own fertility.  But if so they don't seem very comfortable saying it.  Thus the prevarication.


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