Ok, so when I was growing up (admittedly quite a while back) I remember reading in earnest sex manuals that it was common for boys to get together in groups and have “circle jerks,” where they’d masturbate.

The text sounded eerily similar to something I just Googled up from Answers.com.

Sometimes this may be in the form of a game. Participants may masturbate themselves in a challenge to see who can ejaculate first and be declared the winner. Other times, one is to masturbate his opponent and the one who ejaculates first is instead declared the loser and may have to eat the other’s semen. Other competitive games include who can ejaculate the most semen, who can ejaculate the farthest, or simply who has the largest penis.

A circle jerk sometimes involves a contest to see who can ejaculate first on a piece of bread or biscuit. The last to ejaculate may be forced to eat the semen soaked biscuit, commonly called “cummy biscuit”, a “limp biscuit”, a “ookie cookie” or, more commonly, a “soggy biscuit”. In Australia, the term “soggy sao” is also used, referring to the popular biscuit produced by Arnott’s. This is often an urban legend associated with fraternity initiation of pledges. Among adolescents, or men with adolescent sensibilities, there may also be a cash prize for the victor, from a collected “kitty”.

Read more of their “Mutual Masturbation” article here.

Anyway while I read about or heard the story often enough in my junior-high and high-school years I neither saw, was invited to join, or even heard about such an event. And if the goal really is supposed to be racing to finish first I’m not sure I missed much since a) while men can generally come pretty quickly when they apply themselves you generally get out of masturbation only what you’re willing to put into it, and b) typically one’s (heterosexual) partner is rarely impressed by demonstrations of rapidity.

Still, times change. Bukkake social clubs , slash-fic fans, and Betty Dodson... not to mention centrifugal sex-education curricula (Abstience-only on the one hand, anything with actual information about sex on the other) tend to make the original, secretive, all-boys idea sort of quaint.

Anybody know anyone who’s actually been there and done that?

Note: Wikipedia’s entry on mutual masturbation mentions something called a “dog pile” which, in mixed company, sounds more interesting.

A “dog pile” is similar to an orgy, except the mass of people on the floor (single sex or both sexes) engage only in manual stimulation, rather than penetration. This should not be confused with a “puppy pile” a non-sexual cluster of people that may occur at a non-sexual “cuddle party.”

Source: Wikipedia

. . .

Hmm. You know how I ramble off topic sometimes? I’m about to really do that here.

That Wikipedia paragraph begins with “a ‘dog pile’ is similar to an orgy…” and then says it’s not an orgy because there’s no penetration. So now I’m really confused. Is that like that “eating each other isn’t sex” things? If there are a bunch of people in a room masturbating together and then someone agrees to penetrate someone else does that suddenly mean everybody’s at an orgy after all? No? How about if two others engage in penetration while everyone else just masturbates? Still no? Then is it still somehow not an orgy if one or two holding out for masturbation even though everyone else is penetrating each other? Yeah, yeah, silly questions. Unless you define orgies or any kind of sex in terms of penetration because if that’s your distinction then you’re going to need those questions.