Via Neil the ethical werewolf, guest-posting for Ezra Klein here’s a (to say the least) provocative conservative case for providing all teenage girls with strap-on dildos. (No kidding!) According to contributor Denise Noe on the arch-conservative Men’s News Daily...
Many Americans are rightfully concerned by the high rate of teenage pregnancy in this country. Few of these pregnancies are planned and most are conceived out of wedlock. Many end in abortion, others in the trauma associated with having a baby and giving it up for adoption. Teenage moms who keep their babies often sink into poverty along with their young. The fathers of these babies are often teenagers themselves and even more frequently unable to adequately support their children or act as responsible dads to them.
Adolescent girls get pregnant. They have abortions and babies. They receive contraceptives. Depending on the law of the state, they may be able to terminate pregnancies or get birth control without a parent’s knowledge or permission. Both teenage boys and girls can buy condoms over the counter
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Sex toys can be an aid to chastity by making it possible for people to gratify their often strong, even overpowering, physical needs without a partner. Such products should be at least as available to minors as contraceptives.
There is one kind of sex toy that is designed for use with a partner and can play a major role in the fight against teenage pregnancy and that is the strap-on dildo with a clitoral stimulator. Not only should it be legal for minors to have strap-ons but furnishing them with these tools should become a standard part of beginning to date.
While it is best for adolescents to avoid any type of partnered sexual activity, the penetration of a male by a female wearing a strap-on dildo is far safer than the more usual sex acts. Transmitting sexually transmitted diseases generally requires skin-to-skin contact.
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Of course, a strap-on dildo could be inserted into a girl by a boy or into a girl by another girl or into a boy by a boy. While no sex toy should ever go from an anus to a vagina, these uses would also cause fewer problems than the more common sex acts among youths. However, the penetration of a boy by a girl ought to have a special appeal to those with old-fashioned values who want to see more young women enter matrimony with intact hymens.
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The strap-on dildo should be available to any teen girl because, regardless of whether it is utilized or not, it makes it less likely she will get pregnant. A girl may react to her date’s pass with a suggestion that is opposite yet similar. He might tell her he does not want to engage in that sort of sex because it could cause discomfort or trigger sexual identity anxieties. She can ask him to compare those problems with the suffering involved in undergoing an abortion or carrying an unplanned pregnancy to term. The analogy could lead to worthwhile introspection and, consequently, improved behavior on the part of teen boys and young men. Thus, the dildo would serve a worthwhile purpose even if it never gets inside a rectum.
Abstinence education, training in the social skills needed to resist unhealthy peer pressures, girls’ sports, and the availability of contraception are all important in the struggle against teenage pregnancy. It is time for the strap-on dildo to play its part in this cause.
Reactions to the post (which evidently first appeared last May) vary widely. Considering the source many people are pretty sure it has to be deep satire, possibly a slippery-slope-invoking riff on progressive advocacy for contraception and abortions for teens. Others feel it might somehow derive logically from the subterranean depths of Noe’s conservatism. Personally I just wonder if “Denise Noe” is another nom de plume of strap-on enthusiast (and coiner of the equalitarian epigram “if one of us gets it in the ass we all get it in the ass”) Laura the Tooth.
However you care parse it, though, one point remains clear: when it comes to promoting virginity and preventing teen pregnancy and STD transmission, even giving teenage girls strap-on dildos would be more effective than Abstinence-only education.
