One of the reasons I like blogging is it helps me unlearn things I incorrectly believe are true and to reinforce things I can’t quite get over thinking aren’t true that really are. Here’s one trivial example of the latter: I already knew better than to drill relentlessly around your clitoris but Steff of The Cunting Linguist really brought it home for me in part two of her Man’s Guide to Cunnilingus.

I don’t know if there’s an area on the man’s body that reacts with the same intensity as a woman’s clit. If there was, it’d probably be the frenulum, that sensitive bit just under the nib of the cock’s tip, which has always been a favourite plaything of mine during fellatio.

But for us girls, the clit is your ticket to orgasmic fame. So don’t even fucking think of starting things there. The clit’s where you go when you want to take her higher, push her to the edge of it all. It’s not an appetizer. It’s not the starter.

The quote is from Part Two but you might also want to read parts One and Three as well.

The clincher came either from Steff or maybe from Shay of The S-Spot when one of them (I can’t find a link) said that past a certain point of arousal pretty much everything between her hips and her knees becomes one big erogenous zone.

I knew it all along but those couple of posts chased away my last remaining doubts.

An example of the first problem — unlearning things I only thought were true — comes from a nifty comment from Gigi in my post about discovering lubricants. Gigi said:

Lubes are my favorite masturbatory “toy” even raking above my beloved irabbit! I use lube as directed but let me tell you a little rubbed on other parts of the body say the nipples or the waist or belly…WOW slipery, slidey cool then warm! Good messy fun. I’m sure that using lube in this way is also great with a partner though I’m only guessing at this.

Gigi, as most of you know or should know, is the author of Mamalicious and Garden of Earthly Gi-lights. —fl]

Which cracked a giant hole in my “learned it so long ago it must be true” understanding that girls don’t like to get messy during sex.

Ok, ok! Before you break a rib laughing at me or anything… I wasn’t being completely stupid. Instead I think I conflated the old complaint about being the ones to sleep on the wet spot and another complaint about the common porn/strip-club trope of oil or mud wrestling. Plus the whole “sugar and spice and everything nice” nursery rhyme.

If I wasn’t being completely stupid I was still being stupid, though. It’s not as though I hadn’t had all kinds of counterevidence, not least of which would be how much fun various partners over the years have loved it when I’ve licked them silly from head to toe but particularly from collarbone to navel, knees to thighs, heels to toes, and pretty much everywhere else. That being just one example. Ok, ok, already, another example would be just about everything one person can do with another with a bar of soap in a tub or shower.

The point is that, for whatever reason, Gigi managed to get something new through my thick skull and I wanted to say thanks for teaching me something I should have known wasn’t true.

I’m seriously gonna have to reconsider this lube idea, by the way. All the partners I’ve ever had who used lube at all typically used just a little dab to sort of prime their wells. Now I’m starting to appreciate why they sell the stuff in pump bottles and I’m going “hmmm….” I’m dying to try more.

Lots more.

Thanks again for helping with my continuing education.